1M B4CK

Namaste!

Hello (translation) friends! Long time, long time. Here's a fun fact for you all: I decided to screw high school and stay in Nepal!!!! Hahahahahh - I wish. Happy belated April Fool's! (Terrible joke can be justified because it's belated and that's just how it goes) (mad props to all the witty bloggers that April fooled their readers. You're mad witty. Yeah.)

So now that you guys got your much-needed dose of my hilarity (haha, oh Lexy), let's move onto more productive things, like celebrating the fact that I'm home. Oh yeah. Hi, I'm home. (And by “celebrating,” I mean, auuuuuughhhh.)

I've been home since Monday, actually, but it's kind of been about easing back into the schedule (by "easing," I mean, getting thrown into the school schedule and speed catching up on boring missed work). It's unfortunate. It really is. My trip to Nepal was AMAZING.

AMAZING.

I had such an incredible, incredible time. The atmosphere there is really indescribable. There were so, so, so many magical moments that consumed my days: from trekking in the Himalayas, to seeing shooting stars, to being accused of being Nepali, to living out of a pack, to rocking minimal showers, to speed shopping in the cheap markets, to getting to meet the most adorable/friendly/intelligent children, to AH I MISS IT SO MUCH.

Nepalis are really incredible and beautiful and HAPPY people. I am so lucky. I got to meet all these children in far away villages (took hours and hours and hours and hours to trek there! AH I AM AN ATHLETE/ ROCKED THE BACK OF THE PACK). They are incredible. Seriously. So open. So happy. They have so little. I am dumbfounded. They made my heart grow and my mouth smile continuously. I really miss them. I really think we could learn a lot from them. You don’t need a lot to be happy. Just be happy. I hope to meet them again.

I could honestly go on for paragraphs and pages and stories on my experience, but I will spare you all. It was an incredible, seeing the world, what could the future be? experience.

Right now, I am in the "sinking in" process. I have been asked many times if this was a "life-changing" trip (as it is advertised). I think it was. I mean, isn’t everything? Everything you do, in some way, contributes to who you are as a person, or how you see things, or how you evolve – and this was definitely one of those experiences.

It really gave me time to evaluate my life and my values and my hopes and my dreams. I am sufficiently confused. It ignited my wanderlust. It made all my dreams explode a million more times. It made me assess what I want in life. Ah, IT'S A LOT. I am happy/confused/scared/hopeful. It’s a melting pot of emotions. It makes my heart pound in excitement and fear. I honestly have NO idea what might happen in the next year, five years, ten years. Not a clue. It’s wonderful.

And now, here I am. At home. It’s weird. I’m getting back in the swing of things. But it’s like AUGH I DON’T WANT TO AND I DON’T NEED TO. As I study for insignificant tests or memorize things I don’t care about, I just can’t help but wonder why? As I type on this laptop or tap my fashion-y feet, it’s like why? I easily went three weeks without Facebook and then BAM, I’m on it several times each day. Why? There’s something about this lifestyle that sucks you into all of these realms and paths that are just there for you to latch on. I think there’s a secret in life. I think that we’re all missing it. (I will proudly note that I have yet to charge my phone. It's been four weeks, ho hum, I am so not popular enough to have a phone!)

It’s interesting adjusting back to the Western society. It scares me, actually, because it’s been so easy and speedy. While the ease of Nepal is consistently drumming at the back of my mind, I can’t help but be sucked in. I’m at a coffee shop right now. I look around. Everyone is engrossed in their own problems or work or conversations. Is this how we live? What are we missing?

Evidently, a lot of thoughts are brewing in my mind. They’re not supremely deep or profound or anything. Just thoughts, just life.

I’m a dreamer. I want to see the world. I want to live the world. I think the most valuable thing I gained from this trip is confirmation. The world is fucking great.

As human beings, I find that we complicate things. We make our lives tougher than they need to be. We create problems that don’t exist, we exaggerate things that don’t matter. Maybe it gives us a sense of significance or purpose. Maybe our “problems” make us feel worthy or necessary. But, really, it’s not like that. Our lives don’t need to be complicated. I don’t think that that’s what life is supposed to be. Life is complicated. But, then again, it’s really, really not. Life is about love, happiness, creation, meaning. Maybe it’s just that extra smile you give to that stranger. Maybe if we all just smiled more.

Right now, I’m riding the wave. It’s a journey. I wonder what will happen in the next year...

Dhanyabaad! Thank you for reading if anyone read all of that. If you didn’t, that’s okay. It’s worth writing out thoughts bubbling in the head. xxx

(I took 2000+ photos. It's impossible to encompass the trip in only these few, but I hope you enjoy them. To be honest, it's hard to capture the essence of the trip without being there. I may post more soon if it suits your fancy or however that lovely saying goes.)

P.S. Despite living in unwashed trekking gear for the last few weeks, I promise that outfit posts will be here shortly. (In Nepal, I couldn’t care less about fashion and outfits and BAM, here I am. Sucked back into it. Not an insult to anything or anyone, by any means. Just an observation. What matters here and what matters there is so different. I don’t know which is right or which is wrong or does that even exist? Is there a happy medium? The world is a big, big place.)