17.4.11

my stomach is grumbling

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Image and video hosting by TinyPic
Image and video hosting by TinyPic
Most recent moleskin page. This is me as a grandma. I'm obviously super fierce. And I'm have tea with frogs. Because, well, duh, I'm the best.
(water colour, pen & ink)

It's not that I'm scared to grow up. But, um, yeah, I kind of am. Not necessarily physically growing up - I'm all for silver streaks and saggy boobs! (Okay, maybe not...) But mentally growing up. There's something so beautiful about being young: feeling that the world is yours, feeling young and free and alive.

I'm scared that I'll grow up and mold into the society around me. I'm scared that I'll settle down for mediocrity. I'm scared that I'll fall into routine because that's "responsible." I'm scared I'm going to stop being a dreamer; I'm scared I'm going to become a realist. I'm scared that I'll stop seeing the beauty in little things.

I'm scared I'm going to be like a lot of adults I know.

Can I just have a squeal fest right here already? I don't wannna groww upppp!

What are your fears?
xxxxxx

35 comments:

pixelhazard said...

Afraid of leaving the earth having made no lasting positive impact? I used to be afraid of getting older and all it entails. Fears change and fortunately dull

Bright Green Laces

theTrendyDwarf said...

I LOVE IT! I actually thought that the grandma was Alice from Alice in Wonderland but all grown up since you had the quote from Walt Disney. Like the concept of people growing up and you depicting Alice which is a little girl growing up. I don't know...BUT the concept is cool. I love it though. Of course you will be fierce when you grow up! You're wicked fierce NOW as it is. What's my biggest fear? Being a failure. Not achieving success. That's my biggest fear. I have one question...what do you use to color your drawings? Like markers or what? Thanks for the comment on my blog and my sketches! I really appreciate it!
Check out my trendy blog!
http://thetrendydwarf.blogspot.com/

Amelie said...

Have you read The Little Prince? It's a children's book, but it's REALLY REALLY good. I read it when i was 17, and was like, "omg, this is so insightful and touching and ...I'm crying!" Anyway, the story talks about how remaining young - even when older - is a good thing. Being child-like is not "bad" like society says.

And I feel ya, I find society to be very trapping, telling me what I can and can't do.

Angelica Ng said...

You when you're a grandma! Wow, how cute! I can actually see you like that! And no worries. You will not grow up to be like that. No way. I can't see it.

http://red-soledfashionista.blogspot.com/

maphi said...

awwww loooool one of my bestfriends and i have peter pan syndrom loooool we will stay young forever xoxo

sojourned in style said...

you are so talented. drawings complete with a major infusion of your personality! adore you as an old lady, still youthful with bold colour. I would hate to grow up live up to all of your fears. being an adult seems like you have to compromise all the beauties of dreaming and simple outlooks behind.

Hello Naka said...

im scared of growing old too :(
but it also annoys me when adults act like children like when they r irresponsible or just plaing lazy XD


i lvoe ur watercolour work it great ur so creative im jelly.

Hello Naka said...

also thanks for the wolf whistl lmao :p

The Urban Fashion Gal said...

OMG youre an amazing artist! I dont want to grow up either, Im scared of the same things you are.

larissa said...

Wow, you are so talented! I love this! I love the quote, the art, the whole concept. Plus Moleskines are the best! Thanks for the sweet comment =] My background was actually one of blogger's preloaded ones. I couldn't believe there was something there I actually liked. And yes, it is kind of like the twitter bird, but better. =]]]

Stina G said...

Hi Lexy, thanks for stopping by my blog, glad you liked it :)
This painting is so cute! Nicely done.

Don't worry about growing up too much. Stay true to yourself - remember what is important to YOU, and it will be all good :)

Eli said...

Ive been keeping a journal since I was about 12 and can trace back my fears of being old and changing way back to then. I'm almost 30 and can attest that it is not as horribly scary as it sounds (and you're nearing only 20!!). You just have to remember to keep doing the things that have always made you happy from being a little kid even. Those things always stay with you.

LyddieGal said...

I afraid too. But I'm afraid I'll keep getting older and not becoming more grown up. That I wont find a job I like, that i'll never have the answer to the age old question: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

That I wont fall in love, that I wont get married, that time is going to pass me by and I wont know where to go, or who I want to be.


But I love granny lexy, she seems like she's totally awesome.

Chic on the Cheap

Alex said...

that drawing is amazing, you are incredibly talented! and that saying is definitely one I agree with. you don't have to GROW UP grow up, you know? I am, for all intents and purposes a fully functioning grown up, who pays bills and has a job and has made some tough decisions and the like, but I still feel like a little kid PLAYING grown up. it's weird. I'm in my mid-twenties, doing all the normal adult things and worrying about all the normal adult things and I still spin in chairs, sit Indian style in important meetings, blow bubbles, surround myself in color, giggle, play, hide, explore, learn and pretty much do everything I used to as a kid, but the only difference is I have more money to do even MORE awesome things! you will grow up, you will take on, at times, overwhelming amounts of responsibility and you can still be as imaginative and whimsical as you would like. a lot of people don't grow up, they don't pay bills, refuse to be self-sustaining, and that isn't the way to not grow up. you have to find a balance between adult and playful inner child. I think just the premise that you are worried about it now means you'll be fine :) you're about to start one hell of a crazy period in your life, everything will change one way or another, and it's amazing. use these formative, post-high school years to form the very best adult you possible, how fun!

Sarah said...

Fun drawing! I feel like I have to remind myself to stay young at heart all the time. It can be tough with so many responsibilities. What a great quote, thanks for sharing and for your comment. :) Those doughnuts were delicious!

Jessica said...

my goodness, lexy, the drawing is amazing. when i first saw it, i thought, a very cute birthday card? and it's your handmade and oh my, really, it's amazing. hahaha
me toooooooooooooooooo. i'm afraid of growing up? really. i'm gonna be 20 this june and i'm kind of wth, i don't wanna be 20. i'm afraid i will be forced to grow up. mentally, of course. hahaha
like i wouldn't be able to do and say crazy and freaky things anymore.
but hey.let's just stay the hell we want to. hahaha. i believe you could be a grown up woman sometimes and sometimes you could be the young fresh ones ignoring the freakin age. :D :D

Absolutely Mrs. K said...

well you are so right, you look like a fierce, stylish, happy, uber fashionable and hot grandma... I know what you mean about growing up. everything looked so simple when we were children. and when we became teenagers, well we were going to conquer the world!!! aquarel is so hard to do, but you did a magnificent job

Absolutely Mrs. K said...

well you are so right, you look like a fierce, stylish, happy, uber fashionable and hot grandma... I know what you mean about growing up. everything looked so simple when we were children. and when we became teenagers, well we were going to conquer the world!!! aquarel is so hard to do, but you did a magnificent job

yiqin; said...

lovely :)

Marella said...

Amazing post!

Clare said...

Great post! I think my fear is not doing everything I want to accomplish in life and/or finding that I am working too hard to really enjoy my life.

Gizelle Faye | Vanilla Ice Cream said...

my fear reaching 75 years old and not having fulfilled my life. growing up is not too bad..there are responsibilities that come with so much gratification that it's worth it. i think though that as we grow up, we should never fail to look at the world like a 7 year old -- with awe and wonder. <3

♥ vanilla ice cream ♥
www.shopyapi.com

FashionJazz said...

You are so talented babe! I am afraid of alot of things babe, but I have learnt to live my life and try not to let fear get in the way xx

Rand T said...

really really beautiful!!!!:)

am afraid of being unsuccessful
xx

Chelsea Lane said...

this is suchhh an amazing illustration, something I want to frame and hang in my room! I am mostly afraid of not being brave enough to go for what I want...I guess I have already passed the phase of thinking the world is mine? something I want to regrasp :) love this post, girl. it's inspiring. bookmarking it.

xoxo

Amada said...

Did you paint it? That's awesomness! Thanks for the most sincere and cute comment ever! :)
xo
I'm following!

Ruta, Look Ugly in a Photograph said...

Haha as someone notes before me, I got an Alice in Wonderland feeling also. I know how you feel. When you get to university, it's like you're being pulled in two directions. There's a part of you that is young, and stupid and wants to be reckless and dream and what not. But another part is stressing about getting good marks to get to into grad/law school (in my case) and it's all overwhelming. I'm basically scared of the same thing as you. I'd rather be a dreamer, but there's always a part of me that questions whether being a dreamer is going to get me anywhere. Then again, I'd rather be a dreamer living in the world's smartest apartment, then be a realist wearing boring black suits day in day out, living in a mansion.

Dear Girl Wallflower said...

wow this drawing is pretty! you captured your face in this, in a good way...me too I have fears of growing older--Im afraid that I can't afford botox and tummy tuck...I had to really work out to stay in shape, and I don't want to look older than my age(although I love to dress like granny) niether fat or chubby...I think with regard to this post, you have to visit this blog link (she's a sweet gal):
http://margaretcruzemark.blogspot.com/2011/04/age-was-never-matter.html

Tom Mack said...

Love it... :P

The Cat Hag said...

Sweetie, did you draw that?

Seriously incredible, and it looks amazing!!!!!!!!!!

Anyhoo, thanks for stopping by my little blog. :)

I have been MIA from it for a bit, my parents are visiting for 2 weeks and I have had no time to do up proper and regular entries hehe.

Hope you are bundled up warmly, it's getting cold here too booooooo.


xoxo,
Addie
The Cat Hag

Roma said...

First off your art skills are amazing. Second I think I would be afraid to be mediocre. I don't want to end up being a housewife who stays at home making sandwhiches. I need to have a purpose in life that leaves a lasting impact on the world. Whoah there that was soul searchy. whatevs!

Oh to Be a Muse said...

honestly, it's very natural to have a fear like this one. but i really don't think you have anything to worry about Lexy! you will always be young at heart because I feel like you have a true awareness of who you are!

Christina said...

I love your water color. It's lovely...I'm almost 30 and still act like a goofball kid all the time. I'm a grownup with the important things like paying my bills and stuff, but not in the mindset. I doubt you will be that boring grownup. :) Trust me. Settling down is natural but that doesn't mean your mind/ideas have to.

Missy Daisy said...

Did you draw that? I LOVE it!

missydaisyrocks.blogspot.com

Sweet said...

In reality I am afraid of growing up alone...I do not want to be lonely...I want someone to talk to and spend my beautiful days with me...

but seriously I am always afraid of spiders hahahah!!! I get scared even just for a super tiny jumping spider...

Kisses
Sweet
PensandLens
@mistytewest